The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries - "Death Surf"

The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries

"Death Surf"
The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries - Season 2, Episode 20
Original Airdate: March 12, 1978

Death Surf

In the classic 1940s film noir "Laura," a detective investigates the murder of a woman and finds himself becoming obsessed with and falling in love with her after she is dead.  "Death Surf" is The Hardy Boys version of that, with Frank hardy becoming obsessed with a dead girl that he failed to save from drowning while on a trip to Hawaii.  Except instead of Vincent Price in a supporting role, we've got a chubby dude from Texas in a Hawaiian shirt named "Hubba."

"Hubba"

The "Laura" in this version is Maren Jensen (Athena from Battlestar Galactica fame) as Maryann Dalton (aka Teri Turner), a champion swimmer who has run away from home for a new life as a singer/songwriter in Hawaii.   There is a bit of a missed oppurtunity here to have Shaun Cassidy sing a duet with Maren Jensen... basically anytime there are musical numbers on this show and Joe Hardy isn't performing in them, I get frustrated.  Even though they are usually super cheesy, that's part of the fun.

Maren Jensen rocks the beach bar, but loses a golden opportunity to duet with Shaun Cassidy.  So sad.

One weird thing in this episode is underage Joe Hardy is getting constantly hit on by an adult woman bartender who is into teenage boys, and it's meant to be funny, not creepy.  Joe even ends up dating her at the end of the episode.  Times sure have changed since the 1970s.

Teenage Joe Hardy and his New Adult Girlfriend

Also be on the lookout for the hotel the Boys are staying in, as it's the same one seen in "Acapulco Skies" and "The Mystery of the Hollywood Phantom."

On the top: "The Hawaiian Surf Hotel." Bottom left: Unnamed Hotel in Acapulco, Mexico.  Bottom right: "The Towers" in Universal City, California.

The Cramps - Surfin' Dead 

More screencaps after the break...

The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries - "Mystery on the Avalanche Express"

The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysterie

"Mystery on the Avalanche Express"
The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries - Season 2, Episode 19
Original Airdate: February 26, 1978

Mystery on the Avalanche Express

Snow skiing!  Avalanches!  Trains!  Nancy Drew!  Spies!  Hardy Boys!  Other stuff!  And... More!  In "Mystery on the Avalanche Express!" The plot is some nonsense about a group of international snow skiers getting caught up with smuggled coins and communist defectors aboard a train crossing Europe to Austria.  Nancy drew gets mixed up in it when a girl switches bags with her, and then the Hardy Boys have to come to the rescue, or something.

Shaun Cassidy shows off his mad "pretending to ski in front of a rear screen projector" skills,.

In an odd bit of "stunt casting" this episode had lots of weird guest stars who kind of blended together into a musty stew of old white guys with bad hair and ugly suits, but were all played by "teen idols" from the 1940s, '50s, and '60s.  Perhaps this gave stars Parker Stevenson and Shaun Cassidy a frightening glimpse of what the future held for them. The guest stars included 77 Sunset strip star Edd "Kookie" Byrnes, Bing Crosby's son Gary Crosby, teen idol actor Troy Donahue, and pop singers Vic Damone, Fabian and Tommy Sands.

The Bad Hair Club for Men

"Are you trying to seduce me, Mr. Robinson?"

 Leonard Cohen - Avalanche

More screencaps after the break...

Knight Rider - Knight of the Phoenix

Knight Rider - Knight of the Phoenix
Original Airdate: September 26, 1982

 Hoff Behind the Wheel

Episode Description:

When police officer Michael Long is shot and left for dead, his dying body is found by the Foundation for Law and Government.  Rather than take him to a hospital, they abduct him to the mansion of weirdo billionaire Wilton Knight, who has his own team of doctors perform plastic surgery on Long without his consent, in order to make him look identical to Wilton's evil criminal son Garthe Knight.  To make up for this horrible violation, they give a Michael a new identity as Michael Knight, and a talking car with super powers.  Michael is then able to use his new face and super-car to bring his own "murderers" to justice, and then teams up with the Foundation to fight crime as "Knight Rider."

Wait, what?  They brought in OSCAR GOLDMAN to perform Michael's reconstructive surgery!  Does that mean Michael is BIONIC?  If so, does that mean that Michael is performing all of the Turbo Boosts and stuff himself, and his car is just a regular Trans Am?  That would make the talking KITT just a hallucination of his brain, which can't cope with the idea that he has a different face AND super powers!  Hopefully I just blew your mind, readers.

So, this is the first episode of Knight Rider, and it's some fun, but strange, stuff.  First off, they did a great job of casting the actor who plays Michael Long, before he gets plastic surger-fied into David Hassellhoff.  The resemblance is close enough that you can believe it's the same guy just looking a little different.  The whole plastic surgery thing is weird, though.  The part where he is made to look exactly like Wilton Knight's evil son Garthe is not actually mentioned in the episode, I think that's actually a retcon that they added in season 2.  Instead, they claim they didn't know what he looked like and the surgeons had to reconstruct his face taking a best guess as to how he should look.  But that is nonsense, they knew he was police officer Michael Long, certainly there must be drivers license photos, other photos, fellow police officers who knew him and could describe him... it just doesn't make any sense.

David Hasselhoff summons every ounce of emotion from his actors' toolbox to show the confusion and dismay his character feels to wake up with a new face.

Second, Michael Long drove a Trans Am, and when he sees KITT, he is convinced that it is his Trans Am.  But it's clearly not the same car.  Long's car did not have a glowing red Cylon eye on the front, or a crazy high-tech dash board.  Does he just assume that every black Trans Am he sees is his?  This also doesn't make sense.

In a darkened room, KITT's Cylon eye stares at Michael... framed between his legs.  This seems oddly eroticized.  Are we sure that Michael and KITT are just friends?

Of course, I'm complaining abou logic in a "buddy cop" show where one of the buddies is a magical* talking car with super powers, so I'm clearly missing the point.  It's just a bunch of fun, 1980s nonsense, and on that score the show is a great success.

* Yes, I know, it's not "magic," it's science fiction.  But it's not really SCIENCE science-fiction, now is it?  The car basically does whatever nonsense they need it to do from episode to episode.

DEVO - SPEED RACER


More screencaps after the break...

CHiPs - "Trick or Trick"

CHiPs

"Trick or Trick"
CHiPs - Season 2, Episode 6
Original Airdate: October 21, 1978

Trick or Trick

It's Halloween, and Ponch and Jon are on patrol in the suburbs, looking to keep the trick-or-treating kiddies safe on the streets.  During the night the duo hunt down a liquor store robbing ghost, search for a runaway boy, nab a candy-snatcher, and explore a haunted house.  Kind of amusing, but maybe somewhat less "action-packed" than a typical episode of CHiPs, but it could be fun to watch if you need a dose of 1970s Halloween nostalgia.

"Put your hands where we can see them, and step away from the candy!"

Ponch Walks Under a Ladder

Grossman's Jack-O'-Lantern

Ponch Breaks a Mirror

Officer Jack

Pumpkin Problems

Ghost Makeup

I totally wore that same Batman costume for Halloween in the 1970s!  Heck, I had that kid's haircut, too!

Haunted Patrol

"Pink elephants!"

'70s Costumes in All Their Glory

Ponch and Jon Explore a Haunted House

Ghost Robber

Run-DMC - It;s Tricky

Beavis and Butt-Head - "Bungholio: Lord of the Harvest"

Beavis and Butt-Head

"Bungholio: Lord of the Harvest"
Beavis and Butt-Head - Season 6 Episode 1
Originally aired Halloween Night, October 31, 1995

Bungholio: Lord of the Harvest

"Bungholio: Lord of the Harvest" was the Beavis and Butt-Head Halloween Special that aired on Halloween night in 1995.  It starts out like a normal Beavis and Butt-Head episode, with the boys sitting at home watching TV.  Eventually, trick-or-treaters coming to their door alert them to the fact that it is Halloween.  The boys decide to throw together some quick costumes so they can go out trick-or-treating and score some candy.  Beavis puts underwear on his head and says he is a "nad."  Butt-Head pours hot cheese sauce over his head and says he is "nachos."

"Trick or Treat!"

What follows is some typical Beavis and Butt-Head comedy as the boys travel door-to-door and interact humorously with the people in their neighborhood, including regular characters like Mr. Van Dreissen, the hippie high school teacher, and old man Tom Anderson.  But things take a dark turn into horror when Beavis ingests so much candy that the sugar rush transforms him into his alter ego "Cornholoio,"  and his insane meanderings lead to a series of violent incidents culminating in his own death.

Beavis is Unwilling to Share the Candy

I remember watching this when it originally aired and being very impressed by the dark turn it took towards the end, perfectly setting the mood for Halloween horror.

Cornholio Wanders Through a Graveyard

Highland Texas Chainsaw Massacre

 Music videos featured in his episode:

• Alice Cooper - Teenage Frankenstein
• Paul Broucek - Hollywood Halloween
• King Diamond - The Family Ghost

Paul Broucek - Hollywood Halloween (Commentary by Beavis and Butt-Head)


See the other music videos featured in this episode, plus more screencaps after the break...

Hanna Barbera Horror

Hanna Barbera's adventure, fantasy, sci-fi, and superhero cartoons often explored horror movie subjects, although in a generally safe, kid-friendly way.  Let's enjoy a few highlights for Halloween!

Frankenstein Jr. - The Shocking Electrical Monster

"Frankenstein Jr. in:  The Shocking Electrical Monster"

Frankenstein Jr. - The Shocking Electrical Monster
Orignal airdate:  September 10, 1966

A vampiric mad scientist named Dr. Shock turns his lab assistant Igor into a giant electrical monster.  The monster then goes on a Godzilla-like rampage through the ocean and city before kid scientist Buzz Conroy and his giant robot Frankenstein Jr. save the day.  This has some great looking horror movie visuals with the mad scientist, his lab, and the monster.  The scariest part however is the fact that Buzz's Dad lets him ride around on the back of a flying robot.  Think about it... would you let a child  ride on top of a moving car?  Or a bus?  Or a train?  Well this is actually more like riding on top of a flying plane, and with no seat-belts, or straps, or anything.  Face it, that kid would be DEAD.

Dr. Shock and The Shocking Electrical Monster Plot Their Wave of Violence

UNSAFE AT ANY SPEED (Part 1)

More exciting screencaps from this episode await you below!

Space Ghost - Creature King

"Space Ghost in: Creature King"

Space Ghost - Creature King
Orignal airdate:  September 24, 1966

This one has another crazy looking mad scientist, named "Creature King."  Space Ghost's sidekicks Jan, Jace, and Blip crash land on a planet, and are soon attacked by a giant red SPACE APE. They escape the mad monkey, but then find themselves captured by SPACE BATS!  They then find themselves CHAINED UP IN THE DUNGEON of Creature King, an alien mad scientist with a menagerie of weird alien monsters.

A Menagerie of Weird Alien Monsters.

Teenage Sidekicks in Bondage

More exciting screencaps from this episode await you below!

Dino Boy in the Lost Valley - The Vampire Men

"Dino Boy in the Lost Valley in: The Vampire Men"

Dino Boy in the Lost Valley - The Vampire Men
Orignal airdate:  December 3, 1966

Dino Boy (a kid trapped in a "Land of the Lost" style valley where cavemen, dinosaurs, and weird monsters exist) decides to build a homemade kite and then strap himself to it an fly around for fun.   Naturally he crashes in to a mountain, because of course he does.  Safety tip: DO NOT STRAP YOURSELF TO A KITE AND FLY AROUND LIKE AN IDIOT.  However, the story does not end with him dying on the mountain with broken bones and a cracked skull.  Because the mountain is full of caves populated with VAMPIRE MEN.  Half-men, half-bats!  So they take them to their Vampire King to kill him and eat him, I guess.  But then Dino Boy's caveman buddy Ugh shows up and "bats" the bat-people with his big wood club.

Vampire Men Out for Blood!

UNSAFE AT ANY SPEED (Part 2)

More exciting screencaps from this episode await you below!

Space Ghost - The Haunted Space Station

"Space Ghost in: The Haunted Space Station"

Space Ghost - The Haunted Space Station
Orignal airdate:  September 26, 1981

Now we jump forward from the 1960s to the 1980s for the relaunched version of Space Ghost.  Space Ghost and his crew get a distress call from a space station and go to investigate.  The space station is shaped like a GIANT SPIDER WEB!  Seriously, if you design your space station to look like a spider-web, you're pretty much begging for trouble, like being attacked by a GIANT SPACE SPIDER, or something.  But in this case, the station has been attacked by a SPACE VAMPIRE, who has turned the crew of the station into ASTRO ZOMBIES!  And if that sounds familiar, it's because I reviewed and episode of "Buck Rogers" earlier this month called "Space Vampire," that basically had the same plot.

Grizzled Face of an Astro Zombie

These people have only been Astro Zombies for ONE day, yet they are already dressed in rags!  Man, Zombies are TOUGH on clothes.

More exciting screencaps from this episode await you below!

The Super Powers Team: Galactic Guardians - The Fear

The Super Powers Team: Galactic Guardians - The Fear

The Super Powers Team: Galactic Guardians - The Fear
Orignal airdate:  October 2, 1985

The Scarecrow stumbles upon Batman's greatest fear when he tries to flee down Crime Alley, the MURDER site of Bruce Wayne's parents.  Batman usually uses his iron will to resist Scarecrow's Fear Rays, but in Crime Alley he breaks down in TERROR.  This was the first time the murder of the Waynes was shown outside of the comic books, and it is remarkably intense and mature for an episode of The Super Friends.  The episode is filled with rain, lightning, SKULLS, and shadows.  It's probably the best episode of the Super Friends ever, and it was written by Alan Burnett who would later go on to produce Batman: The Animated Series, and you can definitely see the roots of that series start to develop here.

The walls close in on Wonder Woman, as seen through the mouth of a skull!

UNSAFE AT ANY SPEED (Part 3)  Oh, man, now even Batman and Robin are getting in on the act, "Ghost Riding" on top of Wonder Woman's Invisible Jet!  At least Robin is holding on for dear life!  Batman is standing upright, not holding on to anything!  Dudes, in real life, you would both be DEAD.  Seriously, you two are supposed to be role models to little kids for Pete's sake!  FOR SHAME.

More exciting screencaps from this episode await you below!

More screencaps after the break...