The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries - "Death Surf"

The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries

"Death Surf"
The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries - Season 2, Episode 20
Original Airdate: March 12, 1978

Death Surf

In the classic 1940s film noir "Laura," a detective investigates the murder of a woman and finds himself becoming obsessed with and falling in love with her after she is dead.  "Death Surf" is The Hardy Boys version of that, with Frank hardy becoming obsessed with a dead girl that he failed to save from drowning while on a trip to Hawaii.  Except instead of Vincent Price in a supporting role, we've got a chubby dude from Texas in a Hawaiian shirt named "Hubba."

"Hubba"

The "Laura" in this version is Maren Jensen (Athena from Battlestar Galactica fame) as Maryann Dalton (aka Teri Turner), a champion swimmer who has run away from home for a new life as a singer/songwriter in Hawaii.   There is a bit of a missed oppurtunity here to have Shaun Cassidy sing a duet with Maren Jensen... basically anytime there are musical numbers on this show and Joe Hardy isn't performing in them, I get frustrated.  Even though they are usually super cheesy, that's part of the fun.

Maren Jensen rocks the beach bar, but loses a golden opportunity to duet with Shaun Cassidy.  So sad.

One weird thing in this episode is underage Joe Hardy is getting constantly hit on by an adult woman bartender who is into teenage boys, and it's meant to be funny, not creepy.  Joe even ends up dating her at the end of the episode.  Times sure have changed since the 1970s.

Teenage Joe Hardy and his New Adult Girlfriend

Also be on the lookout for the hotel the Boys are staying in, as it's the same one seen in "Acapulco Skies" and "The Mystery of the Hollywood Phantom."

On the top: "The Hawaiian Surf Hotel." Bottom left: Unnamed Hotel in Acapulco, Mexico.  Bottom right: "The Towers" in Universal City, California.

The Cramps - Surfin' Dead 

More screencaps after the break...

The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries - "Mystery on the Avalanche Express"

The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysterie

"Mystery on the Avalanche Express"
The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries - Season 2, Episode 19
Original Airdate: February 26, 1978

Mystery on the Avalanche Express

Snow skiing!  Avalanches!  Trains!  Nancy Drew!  Spies!  Hardy Boys!  Other stuff!  And... More!  In "Mystery on the Avalanche Express!" The plot is some nonsense about a group of international snow skiers getting caught up with smuggled coins and communist defectors aboard a train crossing Europe to Austria.  Nancy drew gets mixed up in it when a girl switches bags with her, and then the Hardy Boys have to come to the rescue, or something.

Shaun Cassidy shows off his mad "pretending to ski in front of a rear screen projector" skills,.

In an odd bit of "stunt casting" this episode had lots of weird guest stars who kind of blended together into a musty stew of old white guys with bad hair and ugly suits, but were all played by "teen idols" from the 1940s, '50s, and '60s.  Perhaps this gave stars Parker Stevenson and Shaun Cassidy a frightening glimpse of what the future held for them. The guest stars included 77 Sunset strip star Edd "Kookie" Byrnes, Bing Crosby's son Gary Crosby, teen idol actor Troy Donahue, and pop singers Vic Damone, Fabian and Tommy Sands.

The Bad Hair Club for Men

"Are you trying to seduce me, Mr. Robinson?"

 Leonard Cohen - Avalanche

More screencaps after the break...

The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries - "Voodoo Doll"

Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries

 "Voodoo Doll"
The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries - Season 2 Episodes 17 and 18
Originally aired February 12 and February 19, 1978

Voodoo Doll

Frank and Joe go to New Orleans for Mardi Gras only to get their wallets stolen, like the goofy tourist dorks that they are.  They then find themselves involved in a mystery involving coffins, skeletons, voodoo dolls, and weird rituals, with an assist from an undercover Nancy Drew.  Features the first appearance of Janet Louise Johnson as Nancy Drew, replacing Pamela Sue Martin.

Creepy Red Death Dude

There was a lot of cool voodoo imagery in this episode, but I don't know, I don't think it should have been a two-part episode.  At times it felt like it was drawn a little thin.  Maybe if they had given Shaun Cassidy some rockin' New Orleans musical numbers to perform, it would have livened things up a bit.  Still, a reasonably fun bit of entertainment.

Deadbolt - Psychic Voodoo Doll

Died on the Bayou

Ray Milland and the Hardy Boys Investigate a Crypt

Boys Behind Bars

Tarot Card of Death

Ray Milland in a Coffin

Skull Handling

Spying on a Voodoo Ceremony

The Ritual

Frank and Joe Wake up in Coffins

Flaming Fingers

Weird Mask

The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries - The House on Possessed Hill (1978)

In "The House on Possessed Hill," Joe and Frank cross paths with Stacey, a girl who supposedly has psychic powers, played by a young Melanie Griffith.  After Stacey predicted the injury of a young child, the child was really injured, causing the local townspeople to think Stacey is a witch, and that her prediction caused the injury to happen.  The townspeople are pursuing Stacey like the villagers in an old Frankenstein movie, and she and Joe take refuge in a spooky old house that appears to be haunted.

The Hardy Van Pulls Up to the House on Possessed Hill

What follows is a fun episode with a creepy hypnotist, a bank robbery mystery, psychic powers, a haunted house, and ghosts.  The episode tries to have it both ways in the supernatural department, by coming up with a seemingly logical explanation for all of the supernatural goings on by the end of the episode, only to end with a last minute stinger where Joe sees the actual ghost who haunts the house, similar to the end of "The Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew meet Dracula."

Joe and Stacey

Melanie Griffith is especially fun to watch here, giving a pre-fame performance that is both sweet-natured and unhinged at the same time, so it is as equally believable that she is actually psychic as it is the she is mentally ill, but still making her a sympathetic character either way.

"Yes boys, hypnosis is a serious business.  A man's business.  Not to be trifled with."

Another fun thing to look for in this one is the house itself, which is the same set used as the home of Norman Bates in Psycho.  The interior of this set (with a different, Non-Psycho exterior) was also used in the season 1 episode "The Disappearing Floor."  Also, the interior of the hotel Frank checks in to is the same set used in two previous episodes, "The Mystery of the Hollywood Phantom" and "Acapulco Skies."

"You are feeling sleepy, very sleepy.  When I count to 10, you will open your eyes and think that you are a chicken."

BONUS!  MUSIC VIDEO:
The White Stripes - Hypnotize


More screencaps after the break...

The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries - Sole Survivor (1978)

"Sole Survivor" is an interesting episode of the Hardy Boys.  It opens with Joe Hardy slipping in and out of consciousness in an ambulance after some kind of accident.  He finally wakes up in a hospital in Hong Kong, and is told that he has been in a coma for a year, and that his brother and father are dead.  Heavy stuff.  Of course, since the show wasn't retitled "The Joe Hardy Mysteries," it won't come as a surprise that all is not as it seems.  But it's still interesting to watch Joe as he reacts to his new circumstances, and then starts to unravel the mystery.

Doctors Examine Joe's Hairless Chest

The style and tone of the episode is also a bit different than usual.  It kind of seems like a cross between a film noir and an Italian giallo, albeit one filtered through a 1970s television sensibility.  In particular, there's a few scenes that take place in an closed clothing store in the dark, with the rooms full of shadowy mannequins, that were just a violent stabbing away from being part of a Dario Argento flick.

A Killer Stalks the Fashion Boutique

Eventually we check in with Joe's brother and father, Frank and Fenton.  Just as Joe was told that they were dead, they believe that he is dead, after his car is fished out of a river, but no body was found (they believe it washed out to sea).  It's kind of weird, because the show has the brother and father react not with tears or grief, but with extreme stoicism.  They lay on their hotel room beds fully clothed, with the lights on, just sort of staring into space, and then Fenton grits his teeth and basically says that they are in Hong Kong with a job to do, and they can grieve for Joe after they finish it.  I guess in 1978 this was supposed to show Fenton's strength of character, but by modern standards it seems unfeeling and f---ed up.  It wouldn't hurt your masculinity to show some emotion, and maybe give your son Frank a hug, Fenton!

Frank and Fenton Sleep in their Hotel Room.  Fully Clothed and With the Lights On.

Overall, I found this to be decent episode, and the focus on Joe having to unravel a mystery on his own was a nice change of pace.

BONUS!  MUSIC VIDEOS:

Herman's Hermits - Sleepy Joe





 The Rolling Stones - Soul Survivor


More screencaps after the break...

The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries - The Mystery of the Silent Scream (1977)

The Mystery of the Silent Scream

This episode begins with Larry Storch (most famous for his role as Corporal Agarn on the old TV series "F Troop") playing a washed-up Vegas stand-up comedian, slanting his eyes and delivering a racist impression of a Chinese person.  Looking at this from a modern day perspective, it's not clear to me whether the producers of the show actually wanted us to laugh at this, or if it's there to indicate what an unfunny hack Storch's character is supposed to be.   Hopefully the latter, although I have a sneaking suspicion that might not be the case.

"Ah, so... me Chinese, me play joke, me go pee-pee in your... hey, why is everyone booing me?"

Storch's character, in addition to being a washed-up opening act with delusions of grandeur, is also massively in debt due to a gambling problem.  His solution to his financial woes is to become a mad bomber of the casinos.  He rigs up a variety of remote-controlled bombs and plants them in various spots in the casinos, and then threatens to blow them up unless the casinos pay him off.  Rather than just take the money and leave, however, which would seem to be the sensible thing to do, Storch dresses up in a disguise (the two we see are "Hippie" and "Old Man") and then proceeds to make losing bets at the roulette wheel, and forces the casino to pay him as if he was winning.  This causes large crowds to gather around the table, and wonder why they are paying a guy who is clearly losing.  Apparently Storch feels like this will humiliate the casinos in some way, and add to his sense of revenge.  It doesn't really make any sense.  It seems like the show's producers just decided it would be fun to dress Storch up in some silly costumes, and worked backwards from there.

Larry Storch's "Hippie" Disguise

Storch also has a co-conspirator or conspirators who he speaks with on the phone, but it's never clear exactly who he's talking to.  The person he talks to sounds like the brains of the operation, but the only conspirator we ever see on the show seems like a hired thug, and is wearing what looks like a parking valet's uniform.  I'm guessing it's just another disgruntled casino employee who Storch recruited to his cause.  However, Storch's telephone conversations are what eventually becomes his undoing.  Two young women are on a trip to Las Vegas, and one of them is a deaf lip-reader, who sees Larry Storch talking about his bombing plans on a pay phone and reads his lips.  The girl and her friend try to report him, but no one will take them seriously.  One of the casino bosses takes pity on them, though, and gives them free passes to a Trini López concert with Larry Storch as the opening act.  Which is kind of a dick move when you think about it, giving tickets to listen to a singer and a vocal impressionist to a deaf girl.

Some interesting symbols on Larry Storch's casino chips.  Most of them have a star and crescent moon on them, which symbolizes Islam.  But then there is one stack that has a triangle inside of a circle, which could represent the Illuminati... or Alcoholics Anonymous.  That means that you lucky conspiracy theorists out there can now tie "The Hardy Boys" in to your insane belief systems!  No need to thank me all at once.

Even though the casino bosses and police don't take the girls seriously, they run into someone else who does: The Hardy Boys!  Things get off to a rocky start though, when the girls run the Hardys off the road (they were driving away in fear after reading Larry Storch's lips).  When the Hardys see the girls later at the casino, Joe yells at the deaf girl, and then is humiliated and ashamed when he learns she is deaf.  He then tries to make it up to her by talking down to her like she was a child while simultaneously trying to romance and make out with her.  The whole thing comes across as pretty skeevy, really.  The idea that deaf people are just normal people who just happen to be deaf, and should be treated more or less the same as everyone else never seems to occur to him.

Joe Makes Out With His Girlfriend-Of-The-Week While Frank Watches.  There's No Telling Which One is More Turned On.

Over all, this wasn't one of the better episodes of the Hardy Boys.  Even with Larry Storch dressed in a "Hippie" costume, it just wasn't weird or spooky enough to really excite me the way my favorite episodes of this series do.

...and a Bumper Sticker That Says "No Other Possibility"

FUN FACT:
Larry Storch has had a long career as recording artist, stand-up comedian, and actor in both television and film.  He also lent his voice to many cartoons, my favorite being Filmation's The Batman/Superman Hour from 1968, where Storch became the first actor to voice The Joker in animation.

The Joker

BONUS!  "Mystery of the Silent Scream" MUSIC VIDEOS:

Elvis Presley - Mystery Train


The Electric Soft Parade - Silent to the Dark


The Cure - Baby Screams


More Hardy Boys screencaps after the jump...

The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries - The Creatures Who Came on Sunday (1977)

The Creatures Who Came on Sunday

In "The Creatures Who Came on Sunday" the Boys are driving their van across country to Las Vegas, but they decide to make a detour to Justice, New Mexico to check in on their old friend Bonnie who might be in trouble.  It seems Bonnie's boyfriend has disappeared, but no one in town is taking her story seriously.

 Bonnie is Run off the Road by a UFO

There are two reasons why nobody is taking Bonnie seriously:

1. Bonnie thinks her boyfriend was abducted by aliens.
2. Bonnie used to be a mental patient (but she got help and is much better now, thank you)

Bonnie is Ignored by the Sheriff

The Boys are split about what to do.  Joe wants to write her off as a kook, and continue on to Las Vegas.  Frank however, is willing to give her the benefit of the doubt, and convinces Joe to stay and investigate.  Joe and Frank are put under pressure from the local sheriff and a couple of federal agents to lay off the investigation and get out of town, but of course this has the opposite effect, convincing the brothers that there is a real mystery to solve.

Boys on the Road

Along the way, the Hardys encounter a lot of weird stuff.  Their van nearly gets run off the road by a UFO.  They discover an underground bunker full of people with bandaged faces.  They meet a pair of rifle-toting park rangers, who might actually be undercover military men or federal agents.  They meet a pair of federal agents, who might actually be mafia hitmen or foreign spies.

The Underground Bunker

Possibly the weirdest thing is when they discover a group of families in an isolated spot in the mountains playing baseball.  Frank asks someone what the score is, and is immediately treated with suspicion and marked as an intruder, because none of the people there actually know how to play baseball.  They are just going through the motions, imitating what they have seen other people do.  Creepy.

Strangers Pretend to Play Baseball

All of this weirdness with UFOs and government agents makes the episode play out like a low-rent version of the X-Files, although the episode concludes with the boys uncovering logical, non-alien related explanations for everything they encounter.  They do get in one final "maybe they are aliens after all" moment in, however, right before the screen freezes and the credits roll, making for a fun ending.

Watched by a Mysterious Man in Bandages

THINGS TO WATCH FOR:

• There's a cameo appearance in this episode from Tony Dow, famous for his role as Wally Cleaver in the 1950s sitcom Leave it to Beaver.  He plays the radar operator at the airport that the Hardy Boys talk to while they are investigating the UFO sightings.

"Gee, Beaver, there's no such thing as UFOs!"

BONUS!  MUSIC VIDEOS:

The Rezillos - Flying Saucer Attack


The Ramones - Zero Zero UFO


More Hardy Boys screencaps after the jump...