Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Gremlins (1984)

 Weird, ugly little monsters go on a terror and killing spree in a small town on Christmas Eve.  It should be a Creepmas classic, but it falls a little bit short, in my opinion.  I mean, don't get me wrong, I like it.  It's a good movie.  In fact, it reminds me quite a bit of the famous Mars Attacks trading cards from the 1960s, with it's dark humor, violence, and kid appeal. 

Spike Lurks in the Dark
 The problem I have with it is that it sort of straddles the line between a kiddie movie and an adult one, but as a result it doesn't quite work either way.  If we could have seen the gremlins kill people in more graphic detail, like with dismembered corpses, or the gremlins eating human flesh, that would have been awesome. Throw in some gratuitous nudity, and it would have been perfect!  Heck, the movie already has Phoebe Cates and Judd Nelson in it.  They should have just spliced in my favorite scene the pair shared from Fast Times at Ridgemont High in there.  It wouldn't have made any sense, but I wouldn't have complained.

Elton John was kind of weird in the '80s.
The film has some great bits of dark humor in it.  I loved Phoebe Cates's story of how her Dad died on Christmas Eve when she was a girl.  And the bit with the mom and her two kids with no food to eat was hilarious.  It just never got quite dark enough for me, though.  Alternately, I think the film could have worked very well if they had made the lead kids a little younger, and turned the film into a family friendly movie like E.T.  I just think the way it stands now, where it's not quite adult, and not quite kiddie, it just doesn't work as well as it should.   But it's still a fun way to spend a couple of hours in front of the tube, so I shouldn't complain TOO much.  In fact, the more I think about it, the more I like it.  It was actually pretty funny and weird.  So please ignore this review.  Merry Creepmas, everybody!

Strung up Dog
Phoebe Cates Stabs Zack Gilligan (or whatever his name is) With a Ballpoint Pen
More screencaps after the jump, kids...

In the Gift Shop

Weird Old Chinese Grandpa


Nothing Says "Christmas" Quite Like "Burger King!"  Purchase a Burger King Brand Hamburger Sandwich Today!

Cruella DeVille and Frosty the Snowman


"Who wants heroin?"

Robby the Robot and The Time Machine

Slime Pods

Heart Surgery Movies

Grinning Gremlin

Gremlin in the Microwave

Cowboy Robby

Searching in the Snow

Boiling Pool in the YMCA

Gremlins Run Wild in the Streets

Murder Victims

Creepy Carolers

Screaming Mimi

Portrait of a Grinning Weirdo

Gremlin at the Window

Gremlins at the Movie Theater

Zach Galifianakis (or whatever his name is) is Bloody and Wounded

Spike's Flesh Melts in the Sun

Festive Decorations

Walking Away Into the Night

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